Dawning

Hitherto, no matter how scrupulously I have searched the nooks and crannies of my mind, I have not found the answer, the scintillating spark to alight self-assurance; knowledge to give sense to the existence I lead. Once or twice I have thought I perceived a whisper in the air, a murmured suggestion from the supernatural, a breathed sigh from the contented. But my human ears were not delicate enough to absorb the meaning of such shifts in the atmosphere, and thus, those moments melted into the incessant void time is. My lackadaisicality halted me from truly perusing my environment: at least, it did after I lost hope, and chose to lose myself to the world of dreams. Why bear damage and injury to the body, when I could live a thousand and one lives in my brain? Fantasy feels so much more consistent than reality ever has, my emotions heightened there by the force of my thoughts. But surely, now, I must find a way to change, for I've nary an answer, and wasting my time away, without ever tasting the ambrosia; what a dreadful thought! One might as well snuff the light of their candle out - yes, suicide is better than a hollow life! Yet I've no idea where to begin; and the sweet promise of eternal darkness is too enticing a temptation! - Oh! Be gone deceiving fiend, speak not to me as a lover would: I know your true nature: leave me be! By God! Is the world infested with evil sprites and goblins and fiends? I'm sure it is, for I can't hear the silence; those demons make so much noise! Leave! Disappear! I've enough, you hear? I'm sick of shying away. You shan't lull me back into that false sense of felicity. So can you see that you're wasting your precious breath? Hush! Monsters! What will you gain with my death? Surely nothing, I'm not that great. - Voices aside, I shall try to condense and think only of the resuscitation of my corpse: look yonder! Don't you catch a change of coulour in the horizon, thither? It is I, my friend; I am coming back into the world of the living. Now wait, just a while: the dawning shall come later: it is still the twilight, and we must hold our breaths, hoping to survive the coming night.